September 3, 2002 (1:19 a.m. CDT)
My friend Kelly and his girlfriend Le Ha are driving down to visit me this week. I'm nearly giddy with anticipation, as we haven't had visitors from Winnipeg for almost a year. Some of the things we're planning to do: Visit Southfork Ranch, go to the Stock Yards so Kelly can ride a steer, eat at CiCi's Pizza and check out the Sixth Floor Museum at Dealey Plaza. I'm also thinking about taking them up to the top of Reunion Tower, too.

While finding the links for the previous paragraph, I found an interesting site, Dallas Skyscrapers. It has information and pictures of almost all of Dallas' notable buildings, as well as an interactive map and sample driving tours of the area.

It's only the third of September and I'm already sick of all the 9-11 anniversary hype. Whatever happened to tasteful, personal remembrance? I know that I'm in the minority here, but the attacks of last September didn't irreversibly change my life. I found jobs when I needed them. The arrival of my work permit and green card weren't noticably delayed. Granted, I haven't flown in the last year, but the security delays haven't been too long when I've dropped friends off at the airport. Yes, a number of people died. And I have friends who know people (note the present tense) who worked in the World Trade Center. And yes, these people should undoubtedly be memorialized, but not by a fortnight of news specials, documentaries, "very special" episodes of sit-coms, commemorative plates, over-priced t-shirts and showings of the 1976 remake of King Kong. If you want to remember the WTC victims and heroes, then go to a memorial service at your church, mosque, synagogue, coven, temple, town square or whatever. Pick a name of a random victim and donate some money to the charity of your choice in their name. Masturbate to a picture of Rudy Giuliani (Here's a nice big one for you.) I don't care, just turn off CNN or MSNBC and don't let the media tell you how to mourn.

Something lighter? Happier? Semi-random GIS result? I'm glad you asked! Here's a segment from a map of the University of Wisconsin campus:

September 2, 2002 (11:30 p.m. CDT)
A few noteworthy baseball records were tied today. First of all, the Oakland A's won their 19th straight game, tying the American League record. And to think, everybody thought Oakland was fubared after letting Jason Giambi jump to the Yankees. The second record is a bit more obscure, as Kerry Wood struck out four batters in the same inning.

More beautiful blogging to come in a second or two...

September 2, 2002 (4:22 p.m. CDT)
Just in case you don't find my blog entertaining enough, here's FHM's list of the 100 best Web sites. FARK is there, so is Blogger, KaZaA and TSG. And IMDb. And The Onion. And a whole bunch that I haven't been to yet...see you next month.

I'm going to take a shower now. Fungushead wouldn't let me hose myself down before we went to wash Melonhead (our Chevy Malibu), so I'm feeling a bit grimy...but my mouth feels refreshingly clean! (Fabulous!)

September 2, 2002 (2:55 a.m. CDT)
Tomorrow! tomorrow! I'll sleep in tomorrow! Snoozing the day awaaaaaay...

SETI@Home's servers are being cunts, so my client is having trouble connecting and uploading my completed work unit. I took a look at the plans for SETI@Home's upcoming year, and they look pretty sweet. Details are available at their site.

True to form, Jerry Lewis' annual Labor Day telethon is on the air, raising money for the Muscular Dystrophy Association. Although this is a morbid thought, I wonder what will MDA do when Lewis is unable to host the telethon. On another note, it appears that Jerry Lewis and John Travolta are slowly morphing into the same person. I wonder if Jerry knows anyone at Qantas?

I had an odd conversation at work yesterday. One of my co-workers, a kindly older woman named Louann, told me she was going to work through her break. After I inquired why, she explained that she's be tempted to snack if she went to the break room, and spending fifteen minutes walking around the shopping mall was out of the question. This didn't make any sense to me...why forgo a paid quarter-hour break when you can escape the beeping of the fitting room door's sensor, even if it is in the crappy break room. After a moment of though, I posed a solution: go outside. After three or four hours of department store interior lighting, the Texas afternoon sun is positively incandescent. Sure it's hot outside (for now, at least), but at least it isn't behind a cash register.

September 2, 2002 (12:30 a.m. CDT)
While poking around on Yahoo! Picks, I stumbled upon Urinal.net, a Web site devoted to urinals. I was quite surprised by its thoroughness and the attention paid by the site's authors to their hobby of choice. At least take the time to check out the Top 10 Urinals link while you're there.

This from Boston.com (via FARK): As if Major League Baseball didn't have enough of a bad reputation already, lawyers representing MLB have sent cease-and-desist letters to fans running Web sites (old link removed) devoted to their favorite teams. I guess they hired Disney's attorneys. Oh no! I sure hope an MLB lawyer doesn't see how often I mention that the Texas Rangers suck.

And before I go, here's another random image dug up during a GIS. This time, it's an anonymous Inuit fellow wearing an anorak.

September 1, 2002 (3:36 a.m. CDT)
Just a quick post to add a few things I forgot in my last entry...

I wrote an interesting write-up for E2 about Lamson Cash Carriers. I find the concept of sending wooden cups filled with coins hurtling around department stores at 40 mph appealing. I've had a few customers that I wish I could have bopped in the head. Twice.

Some South African gossip columnist has inside information that Britney Spears is into lesbian porno. No, not performing in the you peckers, watching them. And now she's best buddies with porno starlet Jenna Jameson. (The link goes to Jenna's adult web site, so don't even think about using the library's computers to go there, Spanky.)

Today's Trading Spaces on TLC had special importance to me. The fraternity house that was made over (made into...um...something) happens to belong to the Delta Upsilon chapter at the University of California - Berkeley. I feel for my brothers at Cal, as they got screwed. Lime green? If they had worked with the DU colors (sapphire blue and old gold), and didn't paint over the wooden beams and hardwood floors, it would've looked soooo much better. Instead, the DUs got a circus tent. An ugly, nasty (but vibrant!), semiglossy circus tent.

Off to bed I go, now. I need to get some snoozie-pies before work tomorrow. Ugh. Weekend sales make my life painful. I bitch too much.

September 1, 2002 (2:50 a.m. CDT)
Damn! That was some pretty good stirfry! After watching a late showing of Blue Crush with Fungushead, I had a craving for stirfry. We made a stop at Albertsons for the necessary ingredients: water chestnuts, bean sprouts, stirfry sauce, a green pepper and fresh garlic. I pulled a pair of recipes off of E2, and combined them into a bastardized amalgam. Tasty.

As for Blue Crush, there isn't much to say. Tasty Michelle Rodriguez and tastier Kate Bosworth. Very tasty.

Even though I've had it for a while, I still get off on showing my green card to people. Well, it's not very green at all -- it's mostly white with some green accents and a shiny, brownish anticounterfeit image on the back. The card also uses microprinting techniques to foil counterfeiters, with tiny images of the state flags and portraits of the presidents (up to and including Bill Clinton). It's the coolest piece of ID I've ever possessed, and much, much more official looking than my old work permit (which resembled a badly-done high school student ID).

And before I go, here's a random JPEG culled from a Google Image Search (GIS). Ladies and gentlemen, I present...Spongehat:

August 30, 2002 (2:06 p.m. CDT)
After a long absence...the return of the Friday Five!

1. What's your favorite piece of clothing that you currently own? -- I would have to say my grey hooded sweatshirt (cue Adam Sandler song now). I've had it for two years now, and I'll probably have it for another ten. I had an identical sweatshirt in high school, and I wore the living shit out of it. Eventually, my grandmother had to replace the cuffs and patch a few holes in order to keep the thing in one piece. I had to put the poor thing down in college, though.

2. What piece of clothing do you most want to acquire? -- Good question. I would have to say a replica Winnipeg Blue Bombers jersey, just to remind me of home.

3. What piece of clothing can you not bring yourself to get rid of? Why? -- I would have to say my high school letterman's jacket. It's been abused, and it doesn't fit me anymore, but it holds a number of memories. It was the first major purchase I ever made with my own money. It helped me overcome my shyness in high school. Most importantly, I popped my cherry on it, lying it on the cold, hard concrete of an underground parking lot. I'm sure you didn't need to know that...

4. What piece of clothing do you look your best in? -- This is hard, because I'm not a vain person by nature. I can't say my newest suit, because the tailors did a piss-poor job altering the pants, and they're much too big for me. I looked half decent in my wedding tuxedo, but honestly who doesn't? I'll go with my rugby uniform. When I have my rugby kit on, I look the part... big, mean, melanin-deficient.

5. What has been your biggest fashion accident? -- In my freshman year of college, I had a pair of jeans I refused to part with. They went beyond torn, and veered into the "tattered" stage. The crotch had completely been worn out, and threads and fragments of denim dangled to my kness. But still I wore them, sometimes tieing a flannel shirt around my waist to conceal the damage. I could afford new jeans... I just didn't want to bother replacing the ones I had.

August 30, 2002 (3:20 a.m. CDT)
Is it me, or is Kelly Ripa becoming a little bit overexposed? I'm certainly not against seeing a talk show host cutie and her pert boobies on a commercial or two, but it is getting a bit too much for me. Kelly, ease your way into our collective hearts, lest you wind up hated as much as that hellhag, Kathie Lee.

I'm going to switch gears here for a second or two. After reading a bit about the schism between the Anglican Church and the Holy Catholic Church, a few things came to mind. If the laws prohibiting citizens from obeying foreign religious authorities, would Al Qaeda operatives be guilty of praemunires? I'm sure that no such laws are on the books in the United States -- that whole separation of church and state thing -- but versions may be extant in the UK, or other less secular states like Italy.

I'm going to stray back to the VMAs to add a few more offhand comments... Kelly Osbourne seems to have lost a fair bit of weight -- she's not at the "I'd hit it" stage yet, and may never be. Of all the hotties there (and the number was surprisingly low this year), none got me hornier than Sheryl Crow. It's a bit sad when the 40-year old sets more stirring in the bollocks than girls half her age (although, honorable mentions should go out to Shakira, Chilli and Gwen Stefani). I'm proud that Avril Lavigne stuck it out in the rain for two songs, when she could've easily gotten away with playing her big hit and dashing inside for dry clothes. How many times was Ja Rule nominated... twelve? In three categories? (Actually twice, in the same category.)

August 30, 2002 (12:21 a.m. CDT)
There's something special about watching a Dallas Cowboys preseason game broadcast in Spanish. I'm never sure what the announcers are saying, but judging from the play and my limited knowledge of the language I can get the jist. The Spanish channel dispenses with the flashy graphics (due to cost restrictions, I'm sure), but has far fewer commercials. Also, in true "machismo" fashion, the sideline cameras leer at the cheerleaders without admonishment of any kind. Oh yeah, there's a five hour tape delay. Nice.

Caramelhead and I sat through almost all of MTV's Video Music Awards (old link removed). Man, what a trainwreck. Bungled intros, horrible interviewing from a usually dependable Kurt Loder and the (potentially) funniest spot with Triumph the Insult Comic Dog was interrupted when Eminem confronted Triumph's handler, Moby and the camera crew. MTV, fearing an ugly incident, cut to commercial. Eminem was booed by one fan when he accepted an award (in the next segment nonetheless). When he threatened the heckler, the whole crowd booed him. What was Michelle Branch wearing? (And why couldn't she take the advice of MTV viewers?) Finally, I doubt I was the only person to start surfing halfway through Guns 'n' Roses' performance. Axl sounded horrible and the band, while sounding reasonably authentic, looked like a bunch of Slipknot/ICP rejects. Not an audicious return, by any means.

God bless TNT -- they're playing True Romance. I love that movie. Give the casting directors kudos, as the movie oozes talent: Aside from the stars (Christian Slater and Patricia Arquette), the movie boasts an incredible supporting cast (Dennis Hopper, Gary Oldman, Val Kilmer, Brad Pitt and Bronson Pinchot). The movie also helped a pair of pretty famous actors get their breaks: James Gandolfini (in his second role), Michael Rapaport (in his fourth), Tom Sizemore and Chris Penn. Oh yeah, the movie was written by some fool named Tarantino, before most people knew who he was.

Britney Spears agrees to sing a duet with Tiger Woods at a Montreal strip club. Sort of. Actually, a Montreal DJ impersonating Celine Dion convinced our beloved Ms. Spears to perform at a fictional charity event. I hear she's also going to be teaching Jean Chretien how to dance in Laval and has been booked for a marzipan eating contest in Jonquiere. But I may be wrong...

August 29, 2002 (12:17 p.m. CDT)
After my sophomore year of college, I applied for a geology job with the federal government. I was almost hired as a junior geologist, to go tramping around Baffin Island (in Canada's Arctic archipelago) to do a bedrock survey. No go, though. They wanted someone with first-aid and firearms training, both of which I incidentally had. I think it would have been exciting, tramping over the treeless terrain, hauling hundreds of pounds of equipment, preparing camp, cooking meals... Okay, maybe I lucked out.

And just to show I haven't forgotten, here's a semi-random USPTO patent: A method of treatment of hazardous materials with aqueous air foam of polyhydroxy polymer (old link removed). It combines said polymer with an inorganic polyprotic acid salt, a foaming agent, a pH modifier and water to cover liquid wastes, making clean-up quicker and reducing further contamination. For thrills, read the patent's description of the McColl Dump in Orange County, CA.

As early as tomorrow, the turnstiles at major league baseball stadiums may fall silent. ESPN.com's Page2 has compiled a list of the best fan protest signs. Go ahead, vote away!

August 28, 2002 (11:22 p.m. CDT)
After hashing things out with Caramelhead, we sat down to watch some TV. Once again, American Idol's viewers voted correctly, tossing Nikki McKibbin tonight. Don't get me wrong, I think Nikki is a cutiepie, but her voice just wasn't as strong as her competitors' voices. You heard it here first, watch Nikki show up posing nude in Playboy in approximately seven or eight months' time. She's hot, and she knows it too (she used to be a stripper). I'd buy that issue, baby.

We also watched the Miss Teen USA pageant briefly. The worst thing about teen pageants is the fact that the contestants are mainly egotistical sixteen-year olds with the mentality of fourteen-year olds, pretending to be mature twenty-year olds. Thankfully, we only caught the last minutes or so, enough to see that the right contestant won.

This semester won't be very challenging... no complex geologies or mineralogies. Just cheeseball history and English classes. Shouldn't be any difficulty...

August 28, 2002 (5:36 p.m. CDT)
I've archived the third of the blog archive pages. The process does truncate this page somewhat (which is a good thing if you want that page to load quickly). W00t!

From the "Separated at Birth" files, here are photos of actress Reese Witherspoon (left) and American Idol contestant Kelly Clarkson (right). It's too bad I can't find a good front-on shot of Kelly, because then you can see how similar her jawline is to Reese's trademark profile.

(old image link removed)

I'm sure others have noticied the similarity before, but I haven't found any references online yet...

August 28, 2002 (4:38 a.m. CDT)
Random sound bites from buttfuck-early in the morning:
"It's the new Southwest Border Bowl from Taco Bell... Now I don't have to struggle to keep up my monthly payments... just as a flute can turn a small breath of air... Divorce Court continues with the case... In other words, the horses know more than I do... It's a weighty issue... stranded on a desert world... two-run single... comes to the Aussies' rescue... Who's the funny little man... about $250 million in the first quarter... They have so much fun that they forget it's exercise... 90,000 pounds of tomatoes... He ordered without my permission... Hey, yo shorty, what's up... that allow you to increase or decrease the firmness on your side of the bed... cared the least bit what became of me... you double-crossin', four-legged stool pigeon, you... hook to the body, George, hook to the body...The Rangers win it 9-4... with Cheney last night... I've got thirteen lucky horseshoes... Volunteers of America today... if he's coming with jokes, he can persuade me... the uncertainty regarding stock valuation models... with Tito Puente on the next Sunday Jazz Brunch... caught in a trap... moved to seal the entrance..."

I should be going to bed. I'll need my energy tomorrow, for all of the apologizing I forsee myself doing. Ah, so many disappointments...

August 28, 2002 (1:20 a.m. CDT)
It's been a shitty day. Don't ask. Well, go ahead and ask. I likely won't tell you anyway.

Here's an interesting site: Don't Link To Us! It links to sites with retarded linking policies. Some prohibit deep links, others require that you get written permission before linking to their sites. Others still prohibit sites with "objectionable" content from linking to them. (I guess that would rule my site out, eh?)

In case you've been wondering what p2p applications I've been using to download my tunes, here's your answer(s): KaZaA and LimeWire. Both have their respective quirks -- for some reason I always upload much more when using LimeWire. Hmm.

August 27, 2002 (1:39 a.m. CDT)
Ugh. I ate too much tonight. Damn you Applebee's and your all-you-can-eat riblets. To her credit(?), Fungushead scarfed back more than her share of food. Yay gluttony!

This is a good reason to live. Up the Matildas! (Literally.)

Penney's has a sweet-ass tool set on sale right now. The problem is that I don't need anything in that toolkit... well, almost. Besides the requisite wrenches, screwdrivers, allan keys and sockets (all of which I have), the only tools in the kit that I need are the magnetic, retractable tool fetcher and... um... I forgot the other tool. I guess it isn't that important.

Fucking Tories. Fucking Alliance. Fuck. (old link removed)

August 26, 2002 (5:12 a.m. CDT)
Fucking insomnia. I'm not sure if it was the chicken noodle soup or the lemon cake my wife made, but I can't sleep. It could be worse, I suppose. For example, I could live in Wuhan, China. Besides being slightly dirtier than the DFW Metroplex, there's something about living in the wake of a catastrophic flood.

Yes the Rangers still suck, but at least A-Rod's still the man, and the best shortstop in the game today (not a bad feat, considering the number of decent players at that position). On a related note, the date I picked to see my first Rangers game: August 31. Planned strike date (barring an eleventh-hour agreement): August 30.

August 26, 2002 (4:07 a.m. CDT)
According to CelebMatch.com, my "most compatible celebrity love" is Natalie Maines (100% compatible) from the Dixie Chicks. I couldn't even get one of the hot Chicks; I had to get Natalie. Granted, it's based solely on our birthdays and biorhythms, so I wouldn't put much credence in its findings. Also on my list were Israeli model Shiraz Tal (99%) and singer Anastacia (97%). The best match I found... Rachael Leigh Cook at 96%.

Caramelhead and I are starting to worry about our apartment complex. Besides the usual problems, new ones seem to pop up regularly. Our craptastic downstairs neighbor has been pretty decent these last few months, but our former next-door neighbors preceded their departure with a month of regular visits from the Haltom City PD to quell domestic disturbances. (We think the problem revolved around a rebellious teenaged daughter, but what do we know.) Lately, weekends see drunks congregate in the parking lot. Of course, these are drunks who don't care how late/early it is when they argue, break beer bottles on the pavement or squeal their tires. Fuckers. We're just a few clotheslines and filthy street urchins away from turning into a tenemental wasteland.

In an update from yesterday's comment on the crumbling infrastructure at Penney's... it was uncomfortably warm in the store today. First the Queen Mum, now this. My blog has psychic powers.

I thought this was cool... several thousand Long Island homes may get wind-generated power (old link removed) in a few years. I'm a huge proponent of aeolian power -- we get our electricity from Green Mountain Energy, which purchases its power from turbines in west Texas.

August 25, 2002 (4:22 a.m. CDT)
In the words of my co-worker Kimm (not "Kim", or "High School Kim," as we call her), it always seems like something (major) is broken at the store. Today, it was the elevator. Tuesday, it was the down escalator (seemingly trapping shoppers on the upper floor). I expect a power failure tomorrow. Or worse yet, the air conditioning to break down.

While on the subject of my new workplace, here's a highly-fictionalized version of my workplace, as noded on E2. Just for the record, I do not steal copier paper from JCPenney, nor do I masturbate in the restrooms or smoke nasty cigarettes on the loading dock.

School resumes in two days. I'm not excited. I'm sick of school. Not just UTA, but the idea of school. "One year left" is what I need to tell myself. Actually, it's less than a year now...

August 22, 2002 (3:03 p.m. CDT)
Tomorrow, I have to go pay my summer tuition. Yes, I am late. I suck. But I will finally be able to register for fall semester, which begins next Monday. Yay me. (Can't you just sense my enthusiasm? Nope, didn't think so.)

Last night, I stumbled across Gail Porter World. How did this tasty woman slip though my fingers? She's beautiful... and Scottish... and she desn't hate herself as much as Shirley Manson. (Mmm... Shirley.) Needless to say, I quickly sprouted a stiffy when I found Gail. But I'm too late; she's married a dickhead rock star-wannabe who won't let her pose nude anymore. And he knocked her up. Sigh.

While sitting on the toilet a few nights ago, I tried to think of as many words that have the letter sequence "rb" in them. I came up with a few: barb, arboreal, orb, rhubarb. I blame my schoolteacher wife, who has loads of first grade reading texts sitting about.

One last thing... here's my latest E2 node: Dallas Cowboys

August 21, 2002 (12:08 a.m. CDT)
Today was an interesting day at work. Instead of being the "sit behind the cash register" guy (as I was intended), I became the Catalog Desk's hired muscle. From time to time during my shift, I would be sent to the loading dock to carry/cart out furniture to customers' vehicles. I am the Brute Squad.

Although my blogging has been spotty this summer (to say the least), I will be more active this fall. Once again, you will be able to watch me unload a small minority of my insecurities into the ether. Don't expect much in the way of introspective thought... that requires too much energy to maintain in an ongoing basis.

August 20, 2002 (2:58 p.m. CDT)
A short update for the faithful...

Firstly, I am no longer unemployed. In fact, a day after my last blog entry, I received a call from a second potential employer asking me to come in for an interview on the 9th. I didn't get the job in Grand Prairie (Texas, not Alberta), but I did get the second job. I am now a retail bitch, proudly wearing the JCPenney nametag. Unfortunately, it's the tailend of "back to school", and the start of inventory right now. Ugh.

Not much else to report...still waiting for my student loan. Still sick of school. I'll try to post another entry afer work. OK?

August 6, 2002 (10:00 a.m. CDT)
I don't want to jinx myself, but I may have managed to end my jobless drought. I have an interview today (albeit a job in Grand Prairie) and I got a callback for another job last night. Cross your fingers for me. Please?

In new 'the Texas Rangers suck' news, troubled Rangers reliever John Rocker got into a screaming match with several homosexual and transgendered people at a Dallas restaurant on Sunday. Rocker was at Breadwinners, a trendy cafe and bakery, with his girlfriend. Some people at another table were making "suggestive comments," and after a few less than civil words were exchanged, Rocker left. Outside, he ran into a transgendered person, and according to recent reports, engaged in a vicious argument. Apparently, he uttered the words, "I hope you have AIDS and die." Classy.

August 1, 2002 (1:36 a.m. CDT)
There's a Photoshop contest popping up in 15 minutes, and I plan on being one of the first ones on the train. I hope it's something I can work with...

I really don't have much to say...

July 31, 2002 (9:35 a.m. CDT)
Alright. What's my excuse, you ask? I have several, none of them being terribly valid. Number one: I suck. Number two: I went home to visit for two weeks at the end of June. Number three: My DSL modem was screwy, and I couldn't log on for a week. Number four: I've been preoccupied with noding on E2. Number five: I suck. Number six: I left AT&T, robbing me of valuable blogging time. And number seven: I suck. I hope that appeases you, dammit.

So what's new? Well, as I mentioned above, I quit my job at AT&T Broadband. My schedule was too messed up; I couldn't justify wasting almost two hours commuting to a job where I worked only five hours at at time. School still sucks. (My Windows login is buggered, so I have to use a Mac to write this. Ugh.) The Texas Rangers still suck. Looking for a job sucks. Besides that, everything is peachy.

Here's some of my better entries from FARK Photoshop contests:

I will blog some more later today. Maybe. I promise.

June 24, 2002 (11:04 a.m. CDT)
I'm number one! I'm number one! And two! And six!

I've done a few additional new nodes for E2:
Winnipeg Jets
Winnipeg Blue Bombers

June 20, 2002 (11:11 a.m. CDT)
I found this article intriguing: Why FM radio sucks today (old link removed). It does. I began a blog entry about this, but it turned into a rant. Read it on the Rants page by either clicking here or by using the toolbar to the left.

This summer, the OIT folks here at UTA are doing some maintenance on the computers in the Ransom Hall lab (where I am, at this minute). Essentially, this means that they reformat the hard drives and reinstall everything from a remote server. This process wipes out all of the applications installed, both advantageous and not. I was dismayed to find Audiogalaxy Satellite missing from many of the computers yesterday, but I hadn't heard about this week's settlement between the RIAA and Audiogalaxy. I logged onto AG from another (less monitored) computer lab and found every version of every song I searched for blocked. Hmm... AG was useful, as it tracked down obscure tracks that can't readily be found on Gnutella-based clients. Bugger.

June 18, 2002 (11:25 a.m. CDT)
Kristin pointed out that I have been negligent with my Web page (and thus my blog) this week. I suck. And I love Elsbeth, who has a name worthy of an Anglo-Saxon king.

In surprisingly less than obvious news, the Red River (of the North) is flooding again, spilling its wealth across the land (old link removed). I would post the link to the FARK.com discussion on the article, but FARK is blowing chunks right now.

As for the World Cup, all I can say is that I'm pleasantly surprised. USA, Turkey and South Korea are through to the quarterfinals. Favorites France and Argentina bowed out in the opening rounds. Mexico and three-time champions Italy were eliminated by (supposedly-) much weaker opponents. Who would've thunk it, eh? Only three European teams are left (four if you count Turkey, but that's stretching things), and only Germany was given a legitimate chance of winning at the tournament's outset.

June 12, 2002 (8:55 p.m. CDT)
It's been a while, but I finally got around to adding a new E2 node, for Haltom City, TX.

I should deliver pizzas.

June 12, 2002 (5:43 p.m. CDT)
Okay, who was the bright person who decided to close two lanes of eastbound I-635 in Irving this afternoon? That clever person should be rewarded, because traffic jams give people time to contemplate life, listen to the radio and, if your windows are sufficiently tinted, masturbate. I need more tinting.

As for listening to the radio, I almost won tickets to a Saturday concert by techno artist BT. I correctly identified all five of the bands in "The Soup," but was stumped by the movie sound bite. Apparently, it was an older movie that has achieved cult status in the gay community, which isn't my forte as a moviephile. I would be more upset, but getting to the concert would be a pain as I had to work. Jessie Diva Radio, bless her sexy heart, gave me all the hints she could muster, but I came up with nothing.

June 12, 2002 (2:25 p.m. CDT)
For some reason, the local gas station decided not to hire me. Maybe I was too scruffy- looking (something I would've had to change if I worked there) or maybe I was a bit too needy in the interview. Maybe they wanted someone who'd stick around longer than a year. Oh well, at least I can keep the goatee...

Every once and a while, I turn up at Lileks.com, usually after a fresh referral from my good friend Kelly. James Lileks is a journalist who writes for the Minneapolis Star-Tribune and pens a nationally syndicated column. He also has a bang up Web site full of pop culture artifacts and tchotchkes. Be sure to check out the Gallery of Regrettable Food and the Grooviest Motel in Wisconsin. Lileks also has a well known Web log, the Bleat, which will be permanently linked on the righthand sidebar.

Caramelhead and I indulged in some trainwreck TV last night: Fox's American Idol. So much horrible singing countered with the occasional flash of potential. There's no denying it, we watched for the crappy auditions (and judge Simon Cowell's subsequent ravagings). Who could forget mumbling Buddy Holly guy? Or monotone Christmas Carol guy? Or the girl in need of rhinoplasty who took a Greyhound bus to three separate auditions so that "God could fill her voice" (her words, not mine) with dissonant crap? Good times, indeed!

June 11, 2002 (2:07 p.m. CDT)
It's my sister's birthday! Happy birthday, Janice!

Once again, this is for Karl. Here are the big pictures from Catherine Bell's FHM photo shoot (old link removed). Grrr!

I stayed up last night to watch France lose their final World Cup match (old link removed) 2-0 to Denmark. France is now the only defending World Cup champion to be held scoreless in the whole tournament. And, in the grand tradition of The Onion and FARK.com, the French surrendered this morning.

June 10, 2002 (8:48 p.m. CDT)
I have one less thing to accomplish before I die. I've officially seen an astronomical phenomena, a partial solar eclipse. I timed my break at work to occur slightly before sunset, as near as possible to the maximum coverage of the solar disc. At the time my break ended (approximately 8:25 p.m. CDT), nearly half of the sun was covered. I wound up with the images of a handful of fat crescents temporarily burned into my eyelids. All fine and good, except when you're driving on a busy street.

This one's for Karl-Frederic: Entertainment Tonight has a preview of JAG's Catherine Bell (old link removed) in her cleavage-baring photo shoot for FHM. Yay titty!